Thursday, October 22, 2009

Starting all over again at age 30

I never thought I would start my life over at age 30... starting over from scratch is a very humbling experience. For one thing I did need to be humbled. I know when the money was pouring in that I walked around like the Queen of the world. I know for a fact that I was guilty of acting superior to all mere mortals. And when you find your sorry ass in line for food stamps you get humbled really quickly! I'm not the sort of girl who has ever been afraid of long as it was for myself. I am my own best boss. I know how to work smart and I know how to work hard. I will continue the rest of my life as an entrepreneur. It is what I like and I am sticking to it.

It is so funny how you can think you have everything in life and the rug gets pulled out from under your feet. But at this point I have really made piece with it because I have come to the point where I realize that it all really happened for a good reason.

I did not grow up thinking "Oh yeah I’m going to write a book about how to eat on the cheap!" Nope not my life long goal HOWEVER

Previous to my book I was running travel sites that were funded solely off of advertising dollars and right now... NO ONE is buying advertising...and before that I spent years painting and selling my the form of originals and prints. And right now NO ONE is buying artwork. I had temporarily taken a leave of absence from my art so that I could MAKE THE BIG BUCKS on advertising...and boy did I ever! I was making so much money that my eyes nearly went cross-eyed! I could go out to eat where ever I wanted, buy what ever I wanted and do what ever I wanted...just like a Queen!

But when you trust the person you are married to and they leave you for a former Playboy bunnie and take all the money with them... you must start on over in life! Just a note the former Playboy bunnie and my ex have each gained a lot of weight...I on the other hand have lost a lot of weight. Weird…!

Starting over is a lot like a blank canvas...when you have nothing you have nothing to loose. So I wrote my book, "How to Feed A Family Of 4 on $25- A Week! (no coupons)" And the fact that this recession is preventing people from buying art is in a way a good thing for me because it has forced me to focus ALL of my time and energy into my book. And right now I am just in Promo mode. Which is what I am best at. I am good at selling things. But its not like my book is a hard sell. It sort of sells itself. It has a lot going on.

But I know this time around I have really changed my outlook on life. Instead of just selling the book to make money it is my true intention that the book goes to people who will really benefit from it. I hope that this book means something to people. That it gives them hope. And that they benefit from shopping at the Farmers Markets and cooking for themselves like I have. If you can have less money but your health can benefit from being more conservative then perhaps this recession has some sort of benefit to it.

Some times we don’t want to change. But in our hearts we know we need to. I was forced to change. I did not want too. I did not want to take the high road...I was forced too. But I know in my heart that I have made the most of everything. And at this point in time I can say that I no longer hate god for turning my life upside down. But thank the lord that he never stopped loving me. I am not saying the road has been easy, last year was the darkest year of my life. But the future is looking so bright...I have to wear shades...I have to wear shades!



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